I Should Probably Title This Blog

buttonpoetry:

Jesse Parent - “To the Boys Who May One Day Date My Daughter”

"If you break her heart, I will hear it snap with the ear I pressed against her mother’s belly."

From the Coaches Slam at CUPSI 2014. This performance has the longest sustained break for applause we’ve ever seen a poet have to take.

(via harshtone)

truehustla:

Imagine being given a list of all the people who made you into the person you are today. And next to their name you could see the exact personality trait you got because of them.

(via blogausaurus)

i-r3fus3-2-sinkk:

Bob Saget: Saying fuck you to gender roles since 1994.

(Source: aboysbestfriendishismother, via blogausaurus)

glowcloud:

v0lus:

i love it when teenage boys make edgy jokes and theyre just laughing but ur not laughing. they say shit like “oh come on it was funny”. you still arent laughing. you can see their soul shrivelling before you, you can see the fear in their eyes

it is our civic duty to help boys realize that theyre not funny and they need to shut up

(via blogausaurus)

thorxndor:

I was sitting on my friends bed with her when she came out as gay

and I was looking through a Chinese food pamphlet

so I put it down, looked at her and said “I was going to suggest ordering food but I see now you’d prefer to eat out”

and I don’t think she’s ever really forgave me  

(via blogausaurus)

doctordonna10:

tsundereslasher:

(x)

SAMUEL L JACKSON IS WEARING A SHIRT THAT SAYS IM NOT LAURENCE FISHBURNE

(Source: bootycap, via blogausaurus)

“I could never cheat on anyone. It’s the type of mistake and wrong doing I couldn’t live with. Knowing that you destroyed someone’s trust is bad, but destroying someone’s perspective on love is far too worse.”
— Amino Auditore (via aminoauditore)

(via jellyfishjackj)

rachelzoftig:

typette:

albinwonderland:

ediebrit:

oh my fucking god

huge fucking trigger warning but oh my god

well it’s nice to see this getting a little attention even in a comedic sense, nothing gets the truth across better than that in some cases

lastseasonsloser:

misha-let-me-touch-your-assbutt:

mishasminions:

IT’S BECAUSE THEY’RE FRED & DAPHNE

FUCK YOU AND YOUR BITTER JEALOUS LONELINESS HOWARD STERN

YES SO GOOD!!!!!

(Source: s-gellar, via rachelzoftig)

full-onrainstorm:

WHAT WOULD POSSES YOU TO LEAVE GOOGLE FOR BING

full-onrainstorm:

WHAT WOULD POSSES YOU TO LEAVE GOOGLE FOR BING

(via rachelzoftig)

rachelzoftig:

perksofahunter:

jamesfactscalvin:

canwriteitbetterthanueverfeltit:

stand-up-comic-gifs:

Joan Rivers on the Ed Sullivan Show, 1967 (x)

HOW IN THE WORLD DID SHE TALK LIKE THIS BACK THEN AND END UP HOSTING A SHOW TEARING APART WHAT PEOPLE LOOK FOR A FRIGGING LIVING????

47 years in Hollywood and several thousand dollars in plastic surgery does that to a person.

You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become a villain. 

lmffaooo that comment

wilwheaton:

bill:

javeliner:

hang on, wait a second

laughing hyterically as my stupid body is flung into the sun

I … um …

(via rachelzoftig)